Potion for your Mind’s Motion- Art, Comedy, Mental Health, Imperfect poems, Lived Experience Stories, Advice (good and bad)
A republication from my earlier blog- Dancingwithenvelopes.wordpress.com- originally published August 2017 AUGUST 1, 2017 DANCINGWITHENVELOPES LEAVE A COMMENT Tuesday 1st August is today… I’m finally beginning to return to a mental state I truly couldn’t even remember, or imagine, feeling again, only a few days ago. With it, I am beginning to find I can manage to … Continue reading PUTTING BACK THE PIECES OF THAT JIGSAW
SNIPPETS OF THOUGHT ‘This too shall pass’ -Retrieved from my first blog, where I originally wrote and published this- March 30th 2017- DANCINGWITHENVELOPES Over this last week, it became increasingly apparent that I was moving forwards from Depression. I suddenly had feelings again, I wasn’t under a bell jar, my surroundings were inviting me to … Continue reading REMEMBERING THE ROUTE TOWARDS THE ‘UP’
Trigger Warning- References to suicide and self harm, this is a poem I wrong months and months ago before today, when I found it in saved drafts, I decided to publish it, due to the poignance and the power of the ; and it’s meaning, and significance, worth and hope…
A.K.A Survivor’s Block Original publication from myself, on my previous blog, DANCINGWITHENVELOPES -July 22nd 2019- One tough year indeed that was! I chose to republish it today, as it still resonates quite hauntingly, although not all for the same reasons… This is no apology For loss of ravenous words to free I have been ‘unable’ … Continue reading WRITER’S BLOCK
This post was written by myself, and published first on my first ever blog- http://www.dancingwithenvelopes.wordpress.com- on 10th August 2017. Introduction: Reflective insights into various journaled moments throughout different periods of lived experience, across the years, may be utilised via a type of spoken word time travel, to reveal truth and experience still very much valid … Continue reading Garden for your thoughts…
Originally written and published on 6th April 2018, on my earlier blog- http://www.dancingwithenvelopes.wordpress.com Hidden, lie the unseen branches Vanished, now- unseen green bloom Deathly claws frosting, winter’s gloom Tender, stems sleep, beneath chill moon Fallow, the heart of a breathless Earth Yet still come the brave, to spear through Ice glazed armour You will see … Continue reading The Green Mist
This post was originally published on my earlier blog- dancingwithenvelopes.wordpress.com- On January 19th 2019 Writing this post has taken me a great deal of courage. However, as does every day require courage, every hour that I continue to walk this path, towards recovery. Thus, if ‘practice makes perfect’, I have reasoned with myself, that it … Continue reading Salvaging the sails
Am I ‘allowed’ to post about NOT being ALRIGHT?💙‘It’s okay not to be okay’💚 I wonder why I felt as though this even had to be considered a question… self doubt’s reliable ‘on’ switch, quickly reminded me, as the champion over thinker I am, YES- clearly, self doubt might be pulling too many of my … Continue reading I found myself issuing unnerving questioning to my ‘self’…
New updates and original Artwork! Enjoy! https://mindinmotion.home.blog/2024/07/13/sketch-your-emotions-free/?page_id=3969 Poetry Yet poetry can forge lyrics from mere words, and be sources of support, for when people- myself included- need that extra art of words and reframing of the fight- to help them through darkness coated mental health journeys, where relentless depression and delusions, dissociation and trauma can … Continue reading Explore Original Artwork, poetry, and Latest Updates
Hiding the the shadows, of yet another relapse So sick and tired now I’m locked in flames and smoke filled haze Now frozen in the afterglow Of an old life, an earlier ‘life‘ A life I cling to reluctantly Refusing to let go But the curtain’s drop has severed the show It is time for … Continue reading The disease of addiction- We came to realise
How often do you say “no” to things that would interfere with your goals? Sorry for the lack of divinity or sophistication which I fail today to apply to this daily question- Oh shock horror- we noticed life was pretty brutal and reacted accordingly, send down your miracles then. The ‘plethora of the vocab’ is … Continue reading Daily prompt- easy to answer !
Whenever you turn over that old familiar phrase: ‘Hitting Rock Bottom’, what do you think of? ‘Rock bottom’- in reference to a ‘place’ which words, fears, struggles and experiences, have all come together, in a tragedy of human sufferings, to create language which wields such a strange power, to turn memory and words into a … Continue reading Slipping as I am gripping
My case against Hull Royal Ward 100, is and has been so mentally exhausting, that I've been unable to find the head space, mental and physical resilience, that would be required of myself alone to come up with the best legal and comprehensive, crucially raised and exposed- not to harm the NHS as a National … Continue reading When NHS Hospital becomes the jailer and the failure.
I feel the terror of acknowledgment My whole mind and body, thoughts and beliefs Have been fabricated by cruel trauma’s pretence I’ve been living my whole life in the narrative of the past tense See that colour, glimpse that number? Awaken thy devil’s idle slumber I remember staring, into that stud of a groove, Piercing … Continue reading Making sense
Prove this wrong! Why care? Sometimes to even manage to care is in itself a tremendous challenge, and from a very basic level, there is your first reason to pursue caring- because to be unable to do so is so very torturous, and certainly a place you don’t want to remain shackled within. So care … Continue reading Why Care?
Welcome to the end of another pretty ruthless year; 2024. This time last year, I felt a great deal more celebratory in this day, the birthday of Jesus Christ- 25th December…. I’d just been discharged from a hospital admission whereby my abusive ex partner had found out where I was feeling and staying in refuge … Continue reading Why the fuck did I think that!?
Do you trust your instincts? Would YOU trust this person’s instincts!? Exactly as I thought- NOT A CHANCE 🤣 Seriously though, no I do not trust my instincts! I maybe once thought I could, and subsequently made the error of trusting them in years gone by… But if only you could see the train wreck … Continue reading Absolutely no chance do I ‘trust my instincts’!
It’s supposed to be erratic dark imperfect and a touch off key. Silent imperfection of inexpressible unheard sadness grief desolation and exile. It’s not meant to be a pleasant sounding piece. It’s repetitive, grim, off key, imperfect and broken- the wavering harmony of a voice or melody chained off from help being heard or able … Continue reading Faltering, unpleasant and off key improv- symbolic and telling of the impact radio silence and isolation with zero voice or support from mental health or other services, hear how dreadful I try to express. Now my mind is decaying.
Web. 10 Dark Truths that will Make You Stronger. Well worthy re-blog!
vm.tiktok.com/ZGevAG7E3/ Now that I'm doing the whole sober life thing (not that I ever truly needed chemical assistance to get on the floor and rave like the dance floor is the Lord/Lordess... Lordthey -!?- to which I devote divine worship to, religiously)... I sometimes (every day) miss partying and raving my tits off, like my … Continue reading Enable the (sober life) rave, get thy hose pipe to the garden floor!
Written by myself, a fellow warrior of the mental health lived experience debacle, and the journey of learning how to ‘win’… You don’t have to stay strong for everyone. You don’t even ‘have’ to stay strong as a command given to your own self alone… I think you can give yourself permission and validation to … Continue reading You don’t have to be ‘strong’ all the time…
Words can sometimes deceive us, despite their brilliant potential, they also have a power to constrain us, and lack the power to enable certain things to be expressed… We could write and speak, mask and pretend all we like, if only we could, and also, if only we didn’t inadvertently do our mental wellbeing harm, … Continue reading Sketch your emotions free
Daily prompt- What gets better with age? My blunt answer…
A short read reflecting on the gratitude I have for everything my late mother gave me while she was here, and after…
Hypermanic polar opposites, Bipolar Disorder stirring and bubbling in a broth combined with C-PTSD and a sprinkle of ADHD… Yeah so apparently, that’s me🫨😵💫🫣 Not that my coffee table resembles any such a diagnosis at all! 😂🫣🎵 FYI- It took me fucking HOURS to concentrate enough to write this, so do me a favour and … Continue reading Bipolar ‘tomorrows’
What does "having it all" mean to you? Is it attainable? On ‘attaining it all’ Can it be done? My view: To ‘have it all’, is a misconception of any aspiration, throughout human history and everything we can ever learn and experience, whilst riding out the vast storm, a turbulence of life, tumultuous plus unpredictably … Continue reading ‘Having it all’ means having closeness to ‘no more’
You won’t know until you know, or I’ve died trying to achieve an end which is for the greater good, particularly in terms of politics, philosophy, and end to globalised corruption, and the primary concern of helping others- most specifically in the dual circumstances of addiction and mental health- but what I’m finding out is … Continue reading A warning…
I don’t care anymore about holding back, this is what ‘Great Britain’ looks like today, I am not scared to share situations which others will resonate with, silently. Confession time: Yeah, cheers government emergency crisis loan, I actually ended up using the £348 you to pay for my suicide. Rather than use it for the … Continue reading How about this for a bit of raw reality, shed a little light on ‘Great Britain’s’ plight
Just to clarify, this was never how I intended my life to turn out, but here I am, post crisis-pad intervention, distracting the emotional meltdowns which threaten my own safety keeping faculties, because of lacking options to exist otherwise. Sometimes, I can actually do other things to avoid the consequences of even trying to close … Continue reading Mania and insomnia take on Facebook adverts, for a ‘night’…
Life, death, beauty beside decay, as ms portrayed visually, as a reminder of transformation, which sometimes only starts after death. Madness, eh! Hello hello Is anybody out there? Hello hello Can anybody hear? Hello hello All I hear are echoes I shout your name but no one hears The echoes, echoes, All I hear are … Continue reading Pending echoes- lyrics to my last song, link to recorded version yet to come!
The end of the road, a draft I have published too soon, about my mental health journey, and the consequences of abominable mental health failure in Hull, UK. Suicide- I’m not the only one.
We will see where this goes So yeah, you may have stumbled upon my posts which pertain to serious intent upon giving up. I still feel deeply afflicted by the pain of knowing I could have, and would have, fulfilled a potential, helped others through my lived experiences, go on to be one of the … Continue reading FYI- I ranted myself to life, reflecting on recent posts
What is one word that describes you? What and who the hell am I? My word: ‘Unwavering’ Only because it sounds more poetic and complimentary than ‘stubborn’, ‘defiant’, ‘relentless’, ‘disobedient’, words which I agree do fit my personality, but were usually used in ‘bollockings’ through school years, professional years, and even just generally lost but … Continue reading ‘Ellieism’- One word to describe me, the Ellie who requires her own ‘ism’
Absolute TW on this one, don’t read it if you think your biggest threat to life and stability might be dark humour which mentions matters of mental health specifically. Many people may well be outraged. But you can’t say ‘outrage’ without the inclusion of the ‘out’, and so use that paradox to find your way … Continue reading I am a disgrace, and my field of fucks is barren. This is my Potential farewell.
Literally tell the mental health professionals on a psychiatric ward, I need some help, I’m on the verge of my final goodbye letter… ‘alright then goodnight, out of the lounge, we have to clean now’… ‘I’m scared I might die’ ‘Alright I’ll help you unlock your room.’ Are. You. Fucking. Kidding. Me? I’m not attention … Continue reading Suddenly, crushed again. Mental health crisis UK- you’re even killing me.
Who is the most confident person you know? Guess my answer… The answer to this daily prompt question, asking, ‘who is the most confident person I know?’ Well, I reckon, that despite having had the privilege of meeting some incredibly confident people in my lifetime, and taking inspiration from the their unwavering shine, I find … Continue reading Tooting my own horn without shame 🎺🌈
Poem ‘Imprints in the snow’ A reflective piece inspired and triggered by experiences of C-PTSD, recovery, flashbacks, memories, and resilience.
What is one question you hate to be asked? Explain. Say what? ‘So, I must ask you Ellie, how come someone who’s got a University Degree and a brain like yours ended up an addict who’s also been sectioned on a mental health ward?!’ The question itself is easy and funny to answer if I’m … Continue reading Oh I Love this for a daily Question!
Mental health matters, so damn much! We need to do something to save ourselves, and our mental health systems in the UK…. If you don’t have time to read the full article, then please just tap this link and take 5 minutes to read the cause, then decide to sign or not. If you can … Continue reading Let’s unite for better mental health services
Wow… so many potential titles spring to mind, not all of them favourable! This requires a lightbulb with its own brain I could brainstorm some instinctive ideas: The tangle with a twist All the paths which didn’t exist, which I turned into my own direction The last one standing at the rave, who wouldn’t stop, … Continue reading My biography might be titled…
Question of day prompt You know what, this question is so broad and open ended, that, as a Philosopher trapped inside an idiot’s mind, I’m probably going to have to just make this a quick answer. Because; it’s 7.15 am, and I’ve been thinking so much about so bloody much, all night, that I am … Continue reading You get some really great, amazing news. What’s the first thing you do?
What's your favorite candy? But it’s not actually the lollipop love im implying… Wanna really know? Of course, a you are a Cat, therefore my leader Why, it’s Candy Crush of course! The one and only ‘candy’ champion! The best type of Candy- you can sit there in all kinds of scenarios, for example; -Having … Continue reading Favourite Candy?
It may have only been ‘just one night’ where I found myself , having lost a colossal extent of self belief, motivation and hope, which ‘led me to using for the night’, but a ‘lapse’ is still technically a ‘relapse’, and it needs to be faced, head on, not hidden away from. To own your … Continue reading The sadness seen in the face of a recovering addict, post- ‘lapse’/‘relapse’
Writing Fanfiction in the worlds of Tolkien and Beyond!
Simple words about a complex life.
Growing Through Books, Defying Social Norms
A Journey of Mental Health Recovery
Writing Sparkle Books
Erotic stories for you
Curiosity is a Mental Wanderlust, and Mind Wandering is the process of connecting loose strings of creative thought.
Sometimes You Just Gotta Laugh
Our thoughts define us, so let's focus on a few.
Kinda a poet. Kinda a writer. But not really...
writer. rythmn seeker.
Chaos may Surround you, but Clarity is your Breakthrough.
"Most all of us are mad round here..."
Every step for a brighter path
Mind-in-motion 