Questions needing an answer

If you could make your pet understand one thing, what would it be?

That drinking an entire bottle of Kraken Rum is NOT for cats!

If only she could have understood my English language, when I warned her:

‘I wouldn’t be necking all that Rum, Molly, even I can’t handle the ruin caused by seven shots too many (I lie- I never used shot glasses to measure how much I was drinking, I just went by the remains of the once full bottle, so say, half of it left, or less, to make this judgement call)…’

‘I’m telling you now, you’re going to be that spannered you will think you’re displaced Pangolin, you won’t even realise you have claws’

‘It’s probably pretty bad for you, that.’

Did she listen?

Maybe she heard me make those human sounds she’s used to hearing me utter, but did she UNDERSTAND me? I think not. Either that, or the little tinker simply wanted to defy me.

Look at the state she got herself in, and all for not being able to understand the complexities of human language in the usual word (not Meow) format:

So it became apparent, that not only do cats like Rum, they also don’t understand what you’re saying when trying to give them sensible advice. Subsequently, they end up highly intoxicated, befuddled, drunk and disorderly, and hungover.

If only they could actually understand what we were trying to tell them…

I’m not even entirely sure she learned her lesson. She was that battered, she couldn’t remember where she’d been for months. No recollection of what had gotten her into that pickle.

Now. I just make sure I drink the whole bottle first, before she gets to it before me.

Since I’ve also quit drinking anyway, the issue of remembering how to maintain plausible secrecy and stay one step ahead of the cat, is much easier, these days, anyway.

But wow, did I wish they could understand enough to comprehend any word from me at all!